The ocean was cold that day, but he didn’t care. He was so numb at this point that the cold felt pleasant against his skin. As he made his way to the water’s edge, he watched the sea gulls skim the tips of the waves and dip into the dark water. Her face flashed into his mind as he remembered the last thing she said to him.
“I wouldn’t care if you were dead.”
The thought stung him like the wintery winds now whipping at his back, almost pushing him in a forward motion into the ocean. He closed his eyes. Step by step he inched out further and further, until the water stung his ankles. The throbbing sensation he felt caused him to cry out impulsively. He wouldn’t’ turn around. In fact, he didn’t even look up. He let the water rise over him until he could no longer stand without being knocked over. The waves threw him around like a tiny raft, with no intention of ever letting him wash back up to shore. He was taking in water now, small amounts at first. Instinctively, he spit the water out, attempting to tread faster in order to remain afloat. Then the waves came at him harder, and faster. He was gulping down water now faster than he could swallow or spit it out. This was it. The blue sky above him slowly faded to gray as he struggled to distinguish between up and down. He struggled for few seconds longer to break through to the surface. Hands flaring, feet kicking, he gasped for air. All he got in return was more and more water. This was the end. As much as he thought he was ready, he would have given anything to make this all just a dream. His once flailing legs now hung motionless like an anchor, dragging the rest of his body deeper down towards the sand. The water above had a reddish tint. He was going to hell.
“Come on man, breathe for me.”
A body stood over his, pumping air in, breathing life back into him. Was this hell? The man shook him violently and screamed in his face.
“I am not gonna let you die here! Come on!”
The man pumped harder, and breathed faster. His sweat dripped down his face and landed on the lifeless body below. He was tired, and he knew that what he was doing was pointless. The man fell back onto the sand. He looked at the swollen, pale body next to him and wondered what had happened out there. There was no use trying to figure it out now. He grabbed his red buoy and dragged it behind him as he walked away. A few paces into his walk he heard a noise. He looked around. There was no one else in sight. He looked down at the body on the ground. Lips were moving. Dropping the buoy, he ran to the body and crouched down next to it. He was trying to say something. The man leaned his ear as close to him as he could.
“You were supposed to let me drown.”
“What?”
In a slightly louder voice now, he repeated, “I said, you were supposed to freaking let me drown.”
The man looked at him blankly. He had saved his life and this was what he got? This guy was a piece of work. Silently, the man stood up and gathered his things again. Before leaving he turned to face the guy he had just rescued.
“I’m gonna walk away now. If you really want to drown go on back out there. I promise I won’t save you this time.”
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