Post-Thanksgiving thoughts

Happy belated Thanksgiving to all of my devoted readers! I am truly thankful for all of you. You give me a reason to write. You make me feel like what I write actually matters. I appreciate all of your thoughts and encouragement about the blog. It really does mean the world to me. Please, please, please, keep reading! And please share my website with your friends! Maybe one day someone will buy my blog and I'll get paid to keep writing...wishful thinking.

Another Thanksgiving has come and gone. In true Thanksgiving fashion, I ate entirely too much, drank entirely too much the night before, and did not exercise at all. Shame on me, I know. But I did have a wonderful Thanksgiving lunch with my family and my aunt, uncle, cousins, grandpa, and grandma. And let's not forget my amazing best friend who came down from Northern Virginia to stay with me and eat Thanksgiving with my family instead of her own. Now that is love!

Today was an absolutely gorgeous day! So, after sleeping in til about noon, I dragged my butt out of bed and went running with my mom. For those of you who don't know, we are running together in a 5k in two weeks! And unless I do some serious training before then, my mom is going to kick my butt! She is so dedicated and passionate about running. I envy her and wish I could find the drive that she has to go running everyday. When we first starting running together this summer, I did not like it at all. I prefer running alone so I can get "in the zone" and reflect on life for an hour or so. But I finally realized that it's not always about what I want, so I let my mom start running with me. Today's run was a ROUGH one for me. I felt like I was carrying everything I've eaten from Thursday until today in my stomach. I am not kidding when I say I felt like I was nine months pregnant with food. I couldn't find a good pace, I felt like my feet were stuck in cement, and my mom was leaving me in the dust, literally. So when I finally realized I couldn't catch up with her, I started to get angry. Angry with myself for not pushing as hard as I should, and angry that my 49 year old mother was in better shape than I was. But just when I was about to let the whole situation get the best of me, a young girl ran past me. She doesn't know me but I know her. I know her family. I know that she lost her mother this fall, and won't ever get her back. After I passed this girl I thought to myself, "my mom may be kicking my butt on this run, but at least I've got a mom out here to run with." And I ran, slowly, all the way home; following my mom and feeling truly blessed.

If they say Why? Why? Tell them that is human nature...

Yep, that's right. Give credit to MJ for the blog title. Yesterday while I was getting my nails done the new Michael Jackson movie "This is It" was playing. Part of me wanted to sing along as the little Vietnamese man polished my toes. Another part of me wondered how it was possible for the nail salon to have this video when it just came out to theaters like a two weeks ago. Either way, I enjoyed watching it.

So what exactly was MJ referring to in his song? Well here is my interpretation. Everyone has heard the age old question, "Why do we always want what we can't have?" But what I want to know is, has there ever been a good answer to that question? Why do I want a job I'm not qualified for, the money I don't need, the boy I can't have, and the list goes on and on.

I think it's natural to chase something that we know is not realistically obtainable. The chase gives us a rush, a feeling of excitement and adventure as we plunge into the unknown. But since we know we can't have it, why do we try over and over again to get it? Maybe it's for the thrill, maybe it's because we're bored and waiting for something better to come along, or maybe it's because we know that since we can't have it, we can never be disappointed by it. I would say for me personally, the third choice is my best answer. If all we have are unrealistic hopes and expectations of what something COULD be, then we can't get our feelings hurt. So we keep trying and trying and trying, walking on egg shells and holding our breath hoping that maybe someday those expectations will become reality. But there's always that voice in the back of our head telling us to forget about it, move on, find something else to chase after. So why don't we listen? Why are we so hard headed and stubborn that we try to fight fate and take matters into our own hands? If we keep getting told "NO" over and over again it seems that the logical thing would be to call it a day and start over with a new idea. Let's be serious, anything other than a "yes" is really a no. No matter how you twist it, sugar coat it, you can't change it.

I know it's not easy to quit something, or someone for that matter. But it certain situations it needs to be done. My own personal experiences show that I'm not the best at quitting either. But just because it's hard doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. I think the Fray said it best with, "Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same."

I'm not saying stop chasing dreams, I'm saying wake up and smell reality. The world we live in is cold, ugly and unforgiving at times. A tough skin is required, as well as the ability to quickly bounce back. I'm still working on that. But here's to trying.

I May Hate Myself in the Morning...

Last night I had dinner with a good friend who I hadn't seen in a while. We swapped stories and got caught up on what the other one was doing. Somewhere in the conversation, she asked me if I had heard this song. I told her I hadn't. And to my surprise she actually sang it at the table for me! It was amusing to say the least. I think everyone can relate to these lyrics because we've all been there at some point or another. Enjoy.


I May Hate Myself in the Morning- Lee Ann Womack

Ain't it just like one of us
To pick up the phone and call after a couple drinks
Say how ya been I've been wondering if maybe you've been thinking 'bout me
And somewhere in the conversation
An ole familiar invitation always arrives
I may hate myself in the morning
But I'm gonna love you tonight

Everyone's known someone they just can't help but want
Even though we just can't make it work out
Well the want to lingers on
So once again we wind up in each other's arms pretending that it's right
I may hate myself in the morning
But I'm gonna love you tonight

I know it's wrong
But it ain't easy moving on
So why can't two friends
Remember the good times once again

Tomorrow when I wake up I'll be feeling a little guilty, a little sad
Thinking how it used to be before everything went bad
I guess that's what is
In lonely late night calls like this that we try to find
I may hate myself in the morning but I'm gonna love you tonight

I may hate myself in the morning but I'm gonna love you tonight

I'm a winner...no really I actually won something

Alright, you know its bad when dedicated readers are writing on your facebook wall telling you to update your blog. I feel so important guys!! Thank you! And just so you know, I already had this blog planned out I just hadn't had the time to write it. So here it goes.


For most of my life, I have not been a winner. When I say winner I mean that I usually don't win things, prizes if you will. I never win the little stuffed animal in the glass case at the arcade, I never win raffles at fund raising events and I never win contests that I enter online (not like I really wanted to go to the New Moon premier in New York City anyway...). But lately I've notice that my luck has changed. Yes, that's right. I am now a WINNER! Even if you don't think so my mommy tells me I am. So there. I have three stories to share to prove how much of a winner I am.

The first story happened about two months ago. I was working at a senior citizens health fair event as part of my internship. The event was basically a career fair for old people except instead of jobs being offered, there was life insurance, prescription benefits, and free note pads. Needless to say I was entertained the whole day. Old people love free stuff! Heck, I love free stuff. But old people REALLY love free stuff. Case and point: When you entered the event you got a raffle ticket. Various items were auctioned off from 8am until the end of the event at 2pm. Now just to be clear, none of these gifts were of any real value to me or most other normal people. But regardless, I held my raffle ticket in my hand all day and kept my fingers crossed for a big win. At about 1:55 the auction man held up a bright blue table lamp and said that it was the last item for the day. At this point I was exhausted from standing for 6 hours and being extremely patient with people who could barely hear me. So, when the auction man read off my ticket number, I froze and did a double take at my ticket. Then he read the number again. I was in the very back of the room, standing behind hundreds of old people eagerly waiting to win this lamp, and I held up my hand. "It's me, I won." At this point I was almost embarrassed to claim the prize because every eye was glaring at me with utter disgust. I know what they were thinking. Look at this stupid young girl. What the heck does she need this lamp for? And they were right. I didn't need the lamp. But I NEVER win things. And I was not about to pass up my one chance of feeling like a winner. So I walked up, grabbed my lamp, and quickly carried it out to my car before the old people had the chance to form a mob and take it from me. Lesson of the day, just say no to the raffle ticket at the senior citizen health care event.

My second story comes from this past weekend at a social gathering that I went to with my parents. The party was amazing! There was food, tasty beverages, live music, good looking men, pretty much everything I could ask for in a great party. The purpose of the party was to raise money. So, there were two auctions, one live and one silent. As my parents and I strolled around the room with the silent auction items, I thought to myself, I have a little bit of money and I want to bid on something. Perhaps it was the alcohol talking. Whatever it was, I landed my eye on a teeth whitening treatment and never let go. I stood next to the bid list and watched as people put their names down. With only a minute to go before the bidding ended I wrote my name down, feeling like a sneaky winner, but a winner to say the least. Needless to say I was overly ecstatic when they announced that I won. Everyone that I talked to the rest of the night was greeting with, "I'M GETTING MY TEETH WHITENED!!!!!" Their response was usually, "Oh, congratulations." Then I started thinking that people might think I have really yellow teeth if I keep telling them how excited I am. So I tried to stop, but that didn't really work out too well. On Monday I got an official paper saying that I had won a teeth whitening treatment. HOWEVER, what they failed to mention at the silent auction was that the teeth whitening treatment only includes fitted trays and gel. Still a $550 value that I got for less than half of that. Maybe that's why they call it a silent auction? Moral of the story, read the fine print. But hey, I'M GETTING MY TEETH WHITENED!!!

My third and final story took place two days ago as I was driving home from work. Everyday on my drive home I listen to Hot 100.5 and listen for chances to win concert tickets. This obsession with winning stuff on the radio actually just started recently and has gotten somewhat out of hand. It's like I can't stop myself from calling. I literally dial 50 times trying to get through to win these tickets and back stage passes. Maybe that was normal when I was like 15 but now it just kinda makes me think I'm crazy. This is what my life has come to. Calling radio stations and hoping for some air time. SO, two days ago I finally got my big break! For those of you who don't know, I'm pretty much unstoppable when it comes to celebrity trivia and gossip. I probably read two or three magazines a week, not to mention people.com, and perezhilton.com. So, when yesterdays question asked about a certain celebrity's tattoo, I COULDN'T HELP BUT CALL IN WITH THE RIGHT ANSWER! What was the prize you ask? Oh, just a 50 dollar gift certificate to a tatoo parlor! Obviously I wasn't really paying attention to the prize at the time. So I called in, and after only 2 tries and got through! I gave my answer (Rhianna) and they told me I won! I was excited/embarrassed/happy/confused all at the same time. So the radio DJ asks me, "Do you have any tattoos?" And I answer, "Yes I have one." And he says, "Well would you like to get another?" And I answer, "Sure." Then I started thinking about how many people out there with full sleeves and face tattoos probably wanted to kick my butt for taking that "Free ink" away from them. So, now all I have to do is drive to the radio station and claim my prize. Let's hope I can bring myself to do it. And I guess I'll just have to go get a tattoo now...wouldn't want to let that money go to waste! Some old bald guy would be really upset. Moral of the story, listen to the prize before you call in.

True Life: I'm a ring checker

As many of you know, I am single. In fact, I think single might even be an understatement of what I am. Okay, maybe its not that bad. Being single does have it's advantages. But that's a whole other blog that I don't feel like getting into right now.

It has come to my attention that I have officially become a ring checker. For those of you who don't know, a ring checker is a person who looks at someone of the opposite sex, and upon first meeting them, checks to see if they are wearing a wedding ring. Why do I do this? The answer is simple. A ton of people are getting married these days. And it seems as though I have now reached that age where getting engaged or married is common and thus people my age are wearing rings. Honestly why you would want to be married at the age of 22 is still a mystery to me, but that is beside the point.

My ring checking tendencies started this summer and have become an almost daily occurence. For instance, last night I was at an event for our new governor. Needless to say, there were tons of people at this event. So, I reverted back to my old college ways and made "a lap" around the room to scope out some men. No I didn't walk around by myself like a creeper, thanks. So as I made my way around, I found myself looking at guys and doing a one over from head, to left hand, to shoes. As I stated in a previous blog I am a shoe checker. Bad shoes equals bad guy. So now, on top of being a shoe checker, I'm a ring checker. But here's where the problem comes in. I think men are catching on to us ring checkers. It seemed like every guy I looked at last night had his left hand hidden in his pocket. And let's be honest, I've never been very discrete when I'm looking for something about someone. I may have imagined this but I swear I actually saw a guy put his left hand behind his back when he saw me looking. No joke.

Now that I have admitted to being a ring checker, I must say I feel better. I don't see anything wrong with checking rings. Perhaps I could do it a little less obviously, but I'm working on that. But my question now is, why are all the good looking, nice guys wearing rings? I mean, I'm happy that you found "the one" and all but wear are all your single friends? The search continues on for the non-ring wearing, nice shoe wearing, guy.

Happy Halloween Kids!

I know I'm a little late in wishing everyone a Happy Halloween but its the thought that counts right? Needless to say my Halloween weekend entertaining and eventful. I managed to come home with my wallet, purse, cell phone, and most of my dignity still in tact.

This past Friday I gave in to peer pressure and bought a Halloween costume. I told myself I was not dressing up this year. I said that I was too old and didn't want to look silly. Well, apparently there is no official age were it becomes inappropriate to wear a costume. As I stood in line at the costume store for about 30 minutes, I noticed something interesting. A majority of the people in the store were adults, I'd say in their 30s or 40s. And much to my surprise, these people were not buying costumes for their kids, they were buying them for themselves. Grown women, moms, were trying on sexy cop costumes right before my very eyes. I was shocked, and kind of grossed out. Some of these people did not need to be wearing a sexy cop costume, if you know what I mean. So I thought to myself, am I going to be dressing up as a sexy cop when I'm a mom? Gosh I hope not. I didn't even want to dress up this year at 22 years old. When did Halloween become such a big event? I had my 4 years of fun/semi revealing costumes in college. And I thought the dressing up ended with that. But apparently I still have years to go. I'm not sure how I feel about that. And lets not forget to mention that my costume cost me 50 bucks! 50 bucks for an outfit that I'm going to wear one time. Who knows if it will still fit next year...I'm gonna go ahead and said it probably won't. So I guess I should start thinking of costume ideas for next year so I don't end up back in the Halloween store on the day before Halloween battling it out with moms for the last sexy cop costume.